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- “Tell me your daddy wasn’t around without telling me…”
- Whenever my fiancé is sick, she has me plug my pc into our TV and play games for her to watch.
- You wanna fight? Hold on let me go get my catapult
- Roommate crashed my car while borrowing it to go to work then refuses to pay anything unless I let her continue to drive it in the future
- I work from home, so my dad wanted me to sign for his package. Found this sign outside our door after I signed. For the record, I am not disabled.
- Today marks my fourth sobriety day, and my wife got me this cool coin because she’s proud of me! Alcohol is a thing of the past for me; if you’re struggling, just take it a day at a time. [OC]
- Keisha Lance Bottoms: Biden Will Work With Anyone Who Wants To Work With Him
- So i was at the mall to watch a movie and this cop approached me and i was like,”ahhh,he is gonna check me for weed in front of everyone and make a scene”. But he sweetly came up to me with a smile and wanted to click a pic with me to show his son. Here is the pic, Keep Smiling:)) Have a nice week:)
- (OC) A girl from my college made this for me and called me handsome, been blushing ever since
- I told my wife that Rupert Murdoch’s chin disturbed me. She replied to me with this.
- People still continuously walk in on me handling biohazard and ask me if it’s the bathroom several times a day.
- it’s like they’re mocking me and telling me I suck
- I requested 8 bananas in my weekly grocery pickup order…. They gave me 8 BUNCHES, and managed to only charge me $0.68 – the price of one single banana
- Jonah Hill accepted the lowest wage as possible ($60k for 7 months) to work with Martin Scorsese in The Wolf of Wall street. “It was a dream come true to work with Scorsese, I don’t care about money”.
- Almost ten years as friends, three years dating, three months since he had me pick my wedding stone at a gem show, first week living together. He’s gonna make me so happy.